Self-care is something I knew I felt passionate about before I knew what it was. If that makes sense. Growing up, I’d watch my dad put in long hours at his job, not eat well, complain about neck pain, and put all these other things (including me) before himself and his well-being. I remember one day he gave me a hard time for wanting to go to yoga before taking our dog for a walk. Like yes, our dog was and is the most important being to take breath on this planet, but I needed to take care of myself and yoga is one of the ways I do that. I’m only able to take care of others if I take care of myself first. That’s true for everyone. Duh, we know that.

It’s annoying to me that self-care is still seen as a luxury. Having time for yourself must mean you have spare time and if you have spare time why aren’t you working or cleaning or cooking or raising your kids. Because if you’re not constantly busy and miserable are you even living in America. It’s also ironic that self-care and preventive care are literally the same thing, yet telling someone you’re going to see your chiropractor will yield a different reaction from telling someone you’re off to get a massage. When really the bottom line with both is that you’re taking care of your body so you can be healthy.

Wellness has always been at the top of my list. I plan my life around things I need to do to be healthy in mind, body and soul. And it’s not because I’m a lazy employee or a selfish fiancé or a princess (but also I am a princess). It’s simply because I make it a priority and mold my lifestyle to match my priorities. (That’s a thing you can do.) And you know what? If someone in your life is making you feel guilty for it, kindly tell them to fuck off and enjoy their future diagnosis of stress-induced gastritis and soon-to-follow ulcer.

Things that keep me feeling good

Deciding where I want to spend my money and not feeling guilty about it.

Self-care can be as affordable or expensive as you make it. Everyone can take ten minutes out of their day to meditate, pick a handful of carrots over chips and practice gratitude. All that shit is free. I throw my money into fresh foods, quality cosmetics and regular trips to my chiro and massage clinics.

Crafting a balanced life grounded in priorities.

Corporate America still thinks that to be successful, we need to sit in traffic, rush to meetings and eat a microwaved lunch while answering emails. Nah, babe. Not for me. I need the freedom and flexibility to work remote, eat home-made meals, save money on gas and subdue my traffic rage.

Not giving a fuck when I don’t have to.

I’ve learned there’s a time and place to strive for perfection, make a point and offer up your fucks — and there are (a lot of other) times when you’re just wasting your mental energy for little or no return. There are situations that may seem live or die, but if you actually take a step back, most scenarios don’t require many fucks. Think about the last time you got really worked up. Did you waste your fucks? Probs. You need to relax.

Take a couple deep breaths, put on a face mask, read this article, then read my best friend Kate Hudson’s book, Pretty Happy, and go to bed at 8:00 p.m.